I havE met many and Lost Many – still I walk

It’s the evening of Pentecost Sunday, on the heels of bearing my heart to a patient pair of ears, with Game 2 of basketball finals blaring in the living room I am couched.

Keep walking Ceez

Amidst my desire to follow the game’s development, there is a wayward mind intruding. Selfishly, it triggers emotions, thoughts, silent prayers and deep contemplations which are whirling in my head and nudging at my heart.

It struck me – ‘so many people you have met and so many of them you have lost!” This realization has brought about feelings of sheer failure, self-blame, some self-pity and frustration. Having written a book which has been taken completely out of context, simply by the content of its cover has also compounded the outcome of these relationships with some of those concerned.

The efforts made to reconcile with ‘fellow-Christians’ which were vehemently rejected, denied, shunned and ignored have certainly taught me about the value of knowing God for one’s self. It has taught me that it is easier to say we love Jesus than to show we do in times when we really ought to. It has taught me that people of power will use their influence to sway the true perspective of others in order to destroy any remnant of others’ good or positive thoughts about you. It has taught me that even those you genuinely appreciate will give you the Pontius Pilate modus operande – afterall that is easier than facing the true feelings, facts and faith-requirements.

Today, amidst this dark patch I can pull myself together and relish the fact that I have a relationship with the #PowerHouse. A relationship which fulfills me to the point where my cravings are deeply spiritually-based.

The harshness experienced could turn me into a bitter and calous-hearted human. I choose to be different. A choice which often causes inner pangs, but which also results in a closer walk with the greatest example of love, forgiveness and honesty – a closer walk with Jesus.

As the Easter season closes in, it dawns a time dubbed ‘ordinary’ – but alas, there is nothing ordinary about walking with God in authenticity today. With this awareness, I embrace the grace of Pentecost, surrendering All to the Holy Spirit believing that #GodHealsHearts and #RestoresOurSpirits when they are broken. #HappyPentecost #BlessedWalkWithGod #HoldOnToJesus #HisLoveLastsForever

Faith allows me to encourage myself and all of you who cross the path of my writing. God bless You.

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